


Finally A Permanent Death

by just_one_morechapter



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 17:06:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2236797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_one_morechapter/pseuds/just_one_morechapter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Really short one-shot of Dean's death. I may have been thinking about TISOH while it wrote this but I don't reference it, it just made me sad so I wrote something sad</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finally A Permanent Death

**Author's Note:**

> I might use this in a fic, idk???? just something I wrote late one night. It made me cry, but  
> I'm lame and it was late so it might not be sad at all lmao

Dean wasn't going to make it. 

He knew it, and Cas knew it, but Cas just kept repeating "you'll be okay, it's gonna be okay, I can fix it, I'll fix it, you'll be okay" like some dumb broken record. He hated the sound of his own voice, filling up his mouth with worthless words and spilling out over the cold ground where they died with no meaning. Dean was laying on the floor, shivering from cold with a hand pressed up against his stomach. They watched the blood pump out, seep through their fingers and spread across his shirt in an interminable stain, like an ocean of dark foreboding. Cas had a hand over his, but they couldn't cover the wound. Couldn't get it to stop bleeding.

Couldn't save Dean. 

And Cas was babbling like an idiot, tears spilling from his eyes, jaw quaking and he just wished they had never tried to take on such a big hunt. They were so stupid and it was the biggest regret Cas had, except for maybe never kissing Dean and then he realized he was saying this out loud, all of it, and Dean reached up with a bloodstained hand and grabbed the back of Cas' neck and pulled his head down and their lips met, and Cas stopped thinking for a while, just let his mouth run over Deans and felt Dean run a hand through the hair on the back of his head, tried to forget that everything was going to end and tried to pretend they were home, safe in the bunker and Dean's blood wasn't spilling over the ground as easily as if it had been coffee in an overturned mug, until the kiss ended and then he licked his lips and held his breath, holding onto the taste of Dean, the taste of his breath and the feel of his lips. He was on his knees, curled over Dean, trying to touch as much of him as he could, trying to protect him even though it was too late, hands and chest and clutching the cotton of his shirt and the leather of his jacket and one hand was still over the wound, covering Deans and he pressed harder, trying to stop the blood and tell him how much he loved him in one touch. He was sobbing and Dean reached up and touched his face and said "Dang. Shoulda done that a long time ago, my angel."

Cas didn't laugh, let out a sob and turned his face into Dean's hand, willing him to be okay because he loved him so much, and Dean ran his thumb over his cheek, smiling sadly. "Hey, don't be sad. It's okay. I love you, okay? I'm always gonna be with you. Watching over you."

Cas bit back a scream because that was his job, dang it, and he should be able to save Dean, save him and love him and protect him forever, and Dean was too young and too previous and here he was, bleeding his life out onto the streets like some insignificant accident. And suddenly Dean looked up, past Cas, right over his shoulder and a smile broke out on his face, and all the pain and sadness was gone, but he looked so tired, so weary and he smiled so wide and said, "Heya, Sammy," and Cas lost it then, because Sam had been dead for years and when he came back to himself it was day and his voice was raw from screaming and he was still crying and Dean was gone but Cas was still holding his hand, his cold, lifeless, stiff hand. 

The hands that had saved so many lives and held so many guns and loved so much and protected so many people, the hands he had wanted to hold for so long, the hands he had pushed away from himself in purgatory, the hands that were usually so rough and strong and warm and were like stone now, and Cas was crying so hard he could t breath, tears spilling over Dean's lifeless body and all he remembered was when he had watched Tangled with Sam and Dean, so many years ago, and he kept praying he had some grace, anything left, any magic to fall in a tear and he just kept thinking "please, please, please," but nothing happened because he wasn't an angel, not any more. He was a Winchester, and customary to being part of the family,

he was alone.


End file.
